There are different requirements for a nikah marriage according to the various schools of Islam. But following are minimum compulsory requirements:

• The bridegroom must be competent to marry
• The bride must be competent to marry, and should neither be in iddah (waiting period after divorce) nor in the state of ihram (ritual purity, as for Hajj).
• Nikah ceremony – that is (a) ijab – the proposal, and (b) qabul – the acceptance
• The mahr payment must be agreed.

It is mustahab (commended) to give a khutbah before the marriage rites are performed, an opportunity for advising the bride and groom of their marital responsibilities and duties in Islam.

The very shortest khutbah would be ‘Praise be to Allah and blessings and salutations be on the Messenger of Allah.’

The Prophet’s sunnah was to recite the following verses: - 3:102; 4:1; 33:71-72.

‘O you who believe, have reverence for Allah as He should be reverenced, and do not die except in the state of Islam.’ (3:102)

‘O humanity, give reverence to your Lord Who created you from a single soul, and created of like nature its mate, and from these two spread countless men and women like seeds. Have reverence for Allah, through Whom you expect your mutual rights, and have respect for the wombs that gave you birth – for Allah is ever watching over you.’ (4:1)

‘O believers, have reverence for Allah and always direct your words to the right, that He may make your conduct whole and sound, and forgive you your sins. Those who obey Allah and His Messenger have already attained the highest achievements.’ (33:71-72)

The Prophet would then make some short du’a (prayers) on behalf of the couple. For example: ‘May Allah bless you, and may blessings be upon you, and may your coming together be blessed, and increase goodness.’

It was strongly recommended that the bridegroom should then host a public walimah (marriage feast and celebration) for friends and well-wishers, on the day following the marriage. All schools regard this as Sunnah mu ‘akkadah (a binding sunnah). However, as always in Islam, extravagance and ostentation is disapproved.

Legal Marriage in the UK

If you wish to marry in England or Wales, the marriage must be legally registered. The traditional Islamic nikah does not count as legal marriage in the UK – it must be registered as well. To be legally married in the UK it is actually not compulsory to have a religious ceremony at all, although most Muslims would not feel properly married without the religious ceremony. However, if you legally married abroad, your nikah will be recognised as legal, so there is no need to register it.

To be legally valid, a marriage must be

• voluntary
• between two single people
• between people who are over sixteen
• between people of the opposite sex, and
• between people who are not too closely related.

There is no such thing as homosexual or ‘gay’ marriage. Homosexuality is forbidden in Islam, and whereas one can have every sympathy with cases where this has been caused by genuine genetic disturbance, it is nevertheless regarded as a perversion and a sexual relationship outside marriage. (Where a person is homosexual, or has homosexual tendencies, but does not actually have a physical relationship with anyone of the same sex – they have committed no sin, but rather have earned blessings and hasanat for their self-control and sacrifice – just as those with strong sexual urges control them by not seeking sexual relationships with anyone outside their marriage, no matter how tempted they might be).

The civil ceremony can take place at a register office, or any other non-religious premises that have been approved by the local authority for marriages (for example, hotel, stately home). The civil ceremony can also take place in any place of worship which has been formally registered by the Registrar General for Marriages. A mosque can also get itself registered.

No Force or Falsehood

• Both man and woman must be acting voluntarily. Force, fear and duress will invalidate the marriage, both in UK law and in Shari’ah law. However, it must be real duress, and not just a giving in to social pressure or the desire to please one’s parents.
• The marriage is invalid if one of the couple did not realise what he or she was doing, for example through drunkenness, old age or deliberate deception such as a girl being made to sign papers she does not understand.
• If there is a mistake as to the identity of the other partner the marriage is invalid. Other mistakes, however, do not invalidate it – things such as being mistaken as to the partner’s financial standing, social status or career prospects.
• Neither party can be already married. They must either be single, widowed or divorced. If either is already married at the time of the ceremony, the marriage is void and the offence of bigamy will have been committed. If the bigamist duped a woman maliciously or fraudulently, she is entitled to prosecute.
  
  Normally the police do not prosecute these days if the sole purpose of the bigamous marriage was to allow the couple to live together ‘respectably’ as man and wife. When a person has been married, but long separated from a previous spouse, the court should be asked to grant a decree of presumption of death and divorce, or to grant a divorce based on the grounds of five years’ separation. Unless such an order is obtained, there is always a risk that such a marriage will be bigamous. A bigamous marriage is null and void, as if they have never married.
• Since 1929 the minimum age for marriage in the UK has been sixteen. Persons under eighteen need to obtain the signed consent of parent or guardian to the marriage. If the consent is forged by the youngster aged between sixteen and eighteen, or if the youngster lies about his or her age, the marriage will remain valid but the youngster will have committed a criminal offence. The marriage is invalid if the youngster is under sixteen. In Muslim cases where a young person has been married outside the UK at an age less than sixteen, the marriage should be performed again legally in the UK once that person has reached sixteen. If the parents refuse consent to someone over sixteen and under eighteen, the person may apply to a magistrate’s court, county court or the High Court. It is usually most convenient to go to the local magistrate’s court.
• Homosexual or lesbian ‘marriages’ have no legal validity. Nor do ‘sex-change’ marriages.
• Certain family relationships are ‘prohibited degrees’. In these cases marriage is prohibited in UK law.

A man may not marry his – mother, daughter, grandmother, granddaughter, sister, mother-in-law, stepdaughter, daughter-in-law, grandfather’s wife, wife’s grandmother, wife’s granddaughter, grandson’s wife, aunt or niece.

A woman may not marry her – father, son, grandfather, grandson, brother, father-in-law, stepson, son-inlaw, grandmother’s husband, husband’s grandfather, husband’s grandson, granddaughter’s husband, uncle or nephew.

In addition to these UK prohibited decrees, Allah lay down others in the Qur’an, for Muslims. On the other hand, some of these relationships, such as stepdaughter, are allowed in Islam on the grounds that it is not a blood-relationship – but they are not legal in the UK.

‘Forbidden to you for marriage are: your mothers, your daughters, your sisters, your paternal aunts, your maternal aunts, daughters of your brothers, daughters of your sisters, your foster-mothers, your foster-sisters, the mothers of your wives, your stepdaughters under your guardianship from those wives with whom you have consummated your marriage,(no prohibition if you have not consummated that marriage); the wives of your sons that proceeded from your loins; or two sisters in wedlock at the same time, except for what happened in the past –for God is forgiving, most merciful. Also prohibited are women already married, except those whom your right hands possess; thus has Allah ordained prohibitions against you. Except for these, all others are lawful, provided you seek them (in marriage) with gifts from your property, desiring chastity not lust. Seeing that you derive benefit from them, give them their dowers as prescribed; but if after a dower is prescribed you agree mutually (to vary it) there is no blame on you; God is all-knowing, all-wise. If you have not the means to wed free believing women, they may wed believing girls from among those whom their right hands possess; and God has full knowledge about your faith. You are one from another; marry then with the permission of their owners, and give them their dowers according to what is reasonable – they should be chaste, not lustful nor taking paramours; when they are taken in marriage, if they fall into shame their punishment is half that of free women. This permission is for those among you who fear sin. But it is better for you that you practise self-restraint. And Allah is Oft-Forgiving, Most Merciful. (Surah 4:23-25).

Marriage to cousins is allowed, but not recommended. It is also not recommended to marry your husband’s brother unless your husband dies (or wife’s sister).

Polygamous marriages. No marriage that takes place in the UK can be valid if one of the parties is already married. Such a marriage is void, and also bigamous. However, it is understood that Muslim cultures allow a man to have more than one wife, and the question then arises of whether UK courts will recognise all the marriages made by a polygamous foreigner in his country of origin, or whether they will recognise only the first marriage. The position is complicated, but basically our courts will recognise all the marriages if:

• They took place in the Muslim country of origin
• They complied with the laws of the country where they took place
• The spouses were capable of marrying (ie not within the prohibited decrees etc) according to the laws of their respective countries.

Anyone in doubt should seek legal advice.

The Prophet’s Sunnah

The Prophet presented two sunnat – firstly, he married an older woman and took no other spouse while she lived – a total of twenty-five years. Had he married a younger woman, as was traditional, there would probably have been no sunnah of polygamy at all. Allah knows best. His second sunnah was to marry polygamously, for various reasons, after his first wife had died. He contracted marriages with at least thirteen other women. The Qur’an set the limit of four wives for other Muslim men. (Surah 4:3).

The Prophet did marry two of his cousins – Umm Salamah bint Abu Umayyah and Zaynab bint Jahsh, but these were not his first choices, and the marriages were undertaken for various reasons.

There was no suggestion that marriage to a virgin was in any way preferable to marriage to a widow or divorcee.

Only two of the Prophet’s wives were virgins – Aishah bint Abu Bakr, and Maryah Qibtiyah. All the rest were widows or divorcees, many of them with existing children.